Most marriages and other relationships aren't perfect. Each person brings his or her own ideas, values, opinions and personal history into a relationship, and they don't always match their partner's. Those differences don't necessarily mean your relationship is bound for conflict. To the contrary, differences can be complementary, however, relationships can be tested. Stress in a relationship can also be caused by specific issues, such as an extramarital affair or loss of sexual attraction, or by less specific issues such as a gradual disintegration of communication and caring.

No matter the cause, distress in a relationship can create undue stress, tension, sadness, worry, fear and other problems. There is often the hope that relationship troubles just go away if left on their own. But left to fester, a bad relationship may only worsen and eventually lead to physical or psychological problems, such as depression. Relationship distress can also create problems on the job and affect other family members or even friendships as people feel compelled to take sides.

Couples therapy, helps couples — married or not — understand and resolve conflicts and improve their relationship by giving couples the tools to communicate better, negotiate differences, problem solve and even argue in a healthier way. Discussing relationship problems with your clinician may not be easy. Sessions may pass in silence as you and your partner seethe over perceived wrongs. Or you may bring your fights with you, yelling and arguing during sessions. Both are OK. Your clinician can act as mediator or referee and help you cope with the emotions and turmoil. Your clinician will not take sides in these disputes. Relationship improvement can sometimes be seen after just a few sessions. On the other hand, couples may ultimately discover that their differences truly are irreconcilable and that it's best to end the relationship.What if your partner refuses to attend couples counseling sessions? You can go by yourself. It may be more challenging to patch up relationships when only one partner is willing to go to therapy. But clients can still benefit by learning more about their reactions and behavior in a relationship.